Optimism is hard

2020-01-08

I’m so tired and ashamed of still being stuck in the weight gain-weight loss cycle. I’ve been fighting with it for years and it feels like, at some point, whether it’s reasonable or not, it must say something about me.

I try to remind myself that things aren’t always under my control. I try to remember that I can get this wrong more often than I get it right. I try to be kind and sympathetic toward myself. But it’s hard, and sometimes I can’t do it, and that only reinforces the vicious cycle.

I’m tired of it. I’m tired of trying to be better.

But I’m going to try anyway. Remember, things aren’t always fully under your control. You only need to get it right once. You are doing your best, and that’s good enough.

Maybe this time.